Monday, 4 March 2013

Yawn... Red Carpet Drawl

Indeed, it's one whole week late but I promise you I actually had this written Tuesday night, completely forgetting to hit the post button. Here it is!

Ugh! Stale bread, old socks and dreary weather. This is what I saw at the Academy Awards red carpet 2013. Where has all the excitement gone? Apparently it's no longer with the ever fascinating world of the rich and famous. Almost nothing on any actress this year wowed me. I waited and I waited and yet nothing made me want to gasp in a fit of passion at some elegant little number I would dream of that night. So this is just my opinion, maybe my expectations are high but seriously 2013 you were no stunner. We will look back on this day not remembering THAT dress, THAT colour, THAT actress that looked the business. I'm going to remember this year as the year Seth McFarlane hosted and surprised us all with being an too pretty amazing host. I'll remember it as the year twitter went on a @Annesnipples #AnneHathawaynipples frenzy and the wonderful esteemed men of Hollywood looked as dapper as EVER.

Here's the Papilio award for 2013(if I had to really choose)

Award for most 'daring' - Naomi Watts. Something at least a little bit exciting. It looked rather stunning and Naomi you really are talented - don't listen to the haters.

Award for finally something a little exciting in your wardrobe: Stacy Keibler. You listened! You finally possibly outshone the one and only Clooney that you so luckily link arms with. I also loved the hair!

Award for it's pretty, so I'll give you a nod: Amanda Seyfried. One things for sure: TRUST ALEXANDER McQUEEN. You will look good, you will shine. This isn't the best Amanda has looked but it's a pretty number and although I yawned at it, it isn't anything to complain about.

Most likely to be mistaken as a wedding dress: Jennifer Lawrence. Too much going on and on close inspection the pattern looks like a bed sheet cover or demure curtains. Jennifer you are young and beautiful and cool - be it! You still looked pretty but the endless material just weighed you down... yes, we all saw you stack... I still love you!

The winner for most age appropriate goes to: Sally Field. She was looking the part in this timeless red frock that had a wonderfully suitable train.

Award for actress most likely to bring the shoulder pad back: Halle Berry. To be honest I think I loved this. She really did look pretty smokin hot. It's a dress only she could pull off and I love the rock star inspired hair.

Award for I'm undecided but I think I like it dress: Olivia Munn. Firstly, I think this girl is stunning, like I'm almost slightly obsessed with stunning. And I love her acting and her voice and she has freckles on her face (I'm a sucker for freckles!), I just think she's unique and you need that in this world. This Marchesa number was a delicious red, loved the bodice embellishment but wasn't too sure on the whole drapy business that was happening around the waist.

Best Dressed: Zoe Saldana. Finally something different!!! This number just worked. It looks like one of those dresses that in theory would read as too much, and on the rack would look maybe even tasteless. But throw in a belt, a bow, a train, a top filled with intricately sewn flowers and three shades of colour and you've created one beautiful number. You looked Zoe and I thank you!

Best dressed cast (on stage) - Les Miserables. WOW! Girls you really should have worn these numbers on the red carpet. Samantha Barks - holy cow you are ridiculous beautiful - Stunner and a half! Eddie Redmayne in Burberry, Hugh - leading the pack and cast filled with passion for their craft. I've included a link to the video because one: you'll see the dresses much better that way and two: this was a truly magical performance that I can't get enough of.

And also here's a nod to Charlize (and the Channing Tatum). Your timeless waltz was adorable and so old hollywood, I was gasping! Charlize was wearing a gorgeous number that flowed in all the right places, the detailing at the back and that wonderful whimsy movement it created as good looking people showcased their talent across the stage. It was perfect and I was love with these cute dance numbers.

Worst dress for winning an Oscar in: Anne Hathaway. Oh Anne what were you thinking. Yes, the world does know they weren't nipples, but have you seen the photos? It didn't fit, it didn't work, it wasn't on! The necklace didn't go, the only thing working was the pretty pale pink shade and maybe the hair. Sorry... disappointed.

Worst Dressed: It's a tie: Jennifer Aniston and Reese Witherspoon. I don't know what these were, but they sure weren't flattering. It is no surprise Aniston got it wrong, she's had her fair share of blunders. This red thing was surely not from this decade and Reese what were you thinking? She usually looks great, her petite size seems to just drink up a lovely dress but 2013 did not achieve that at all. This was by far a very very unflattering dress. I don't even want to talk about it, it makes me sad.

Best Men: Daniel Day Lewis, Christoph Waltz, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Eddie Redmayne. Boys you were wonderful. I think the world needs to pay more attention to how dapper the men of Hollywood looked this year. They brought out the classics, they stunned in suits that melt the heart and that I would gladly stroke. Oh, and The men of the Avengers all on stage together (although it really was missing Thor). Good move Academy Awards, really gooooooood move ;)

Loved the royal blue on this and who don't love a bow tie.

There is something so lovable about this fella. You just know he's a good guy.

Joseph my friend how is it that you are so attractive in a very unique sort of way. Absolutely loved the shade and texture and wow! loved the swoon worth tappin. You really are so many wonderful things in one very fine package.

Eddie Redmayne: Looking as great as ever. OK, so I'm not a fan of the weird velvet skull embellished loafers but I watched an interview and he pretty much paid them out as his "poor attempt at being edgy". Gotta love that sense of humour.

And that's a wrap. I will say this though - even though the red carpet was nothing to talk about the show itself was a marvelous affair full of class, well timed humour, a stunner of a stage (claps to this years design department) and breathtaking performances from Adele and Jennifer Hudson to Chicago and Les Mis.


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